Humanising Language Teaching
Year 1; Issue 2; April 1999

For teaching rationale for using jokes go to JOKES in Issue 1

This lorry driver was bowling along in his huge truck when he came to sign that said: low bridge. He pulled up and climbed down from his cab. He looked from the top of his truck to the arch of the bridge and back, scratching his head all the while.

A man passing by noticed all this going on and asked the driver what the problem was. The man had a brainwave:

"Know what you can do? Just let all your tyres down 3 centimetres and then put the air back in that petrol station you can see there, just the other side of the bridge."

"No good, won't work. The problem's not down at the bottom - it's at the top the truck won't get through."

(People from Holland tell this joke about Dutch-speaking Belgians to their South; Dutch-speaking Belgians tell the same joke about the French-speaking Belgians to their South, while the French tell the joke about the Belgians to their North.)

Joaquim lived in Sao Paulo and, like many Paulistas, he had a cousin in Portugal.

He was fond of this cousin so he decided to send him a box of matches.

He wrapped them in a parcel and off they went.

Five days later Joaquim's phone went late at night. The cousin was on the end of the line:

"Hey, these matches you sent, they don't work- such a nice present, but they just won't light"

"What d'you mean they won't light? I tried each and every one of them and they all light perfectly!"

Some time in the early 90's two East Germans were having a chat over their beer:

"Tell me, Helmut, what is the precise difference, as you understand it, between a 'Wessie' (West German ) and God?"

The other one thought for a second and then said:

"Easy......God knows everything but the Wessie knows more."