Teaching Assertiveness in the EFL Classroom

Elena Stolyarova, Russia

Elena Stolyarova presently teaches Business English at department of Foreign Languages № 1 at Plekhanov Russian University of Economics. Spheres of interest include linguistics, discourse, learning technologies and ESP. E-mail: elena100lyarova@gmail.com

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Introduction
Concepts of assertive, aggressive and submissive behaviour
Developing assertiveness skills in the EFL classroom
Appendix 1. Assertiveness skills and language links. Intermediate level References

Introduction

In the process of communication interlocutors build relationships and manage interaction with other people and it is significant to be assertive and reach objectives and goals beneficial to all parties. Communicative skills are in focus of all ESL coursebooks, for example such skills as Negotiation, Presentation skills, Participating in meetings, Giving Instructions etc. are included into many textbooks of general and business English. This article tackles one of the aspects of communication interaction – assertiveness. The approach and activities are described to scaffold and develop students’ assertiveness skills.

Concepts of assertive, aggressive and submissive behaviour

What is assertiveness? In professional and personal life people cannot succeed without being clear about their own goals and objectives. Firstly, a big part of assertiveness concerns clear communication. Secondly, assertiveness helps people approach and respond everyday situation in a positive, confident manner – without being too pushy or passive. In assertive behavior, the goal is to increase the ability to manage interaction with others positively. Thirdly, interaction is based on being honest and direct to fulfill one’s own needs, wants, or desires without hurting others.

The context or teaching assertiveness skills was Business English course for economics students at Plekhanov Russian Economic University, levels B1-B2. Assertiveness was learned and developed by practicing the assertiveness techniques to help students become more confident in expressing their needs and wants and accomplishing their current and future tasks, solve problems, and reach solutions in English as their second language.

In literature assertiveness (Back, R & Back, K. 1986, Michel, F. 2008, Smith M. 2001) is usually opposed to dominant and submissive or passive behaviour. When people express their needs, thoughts, and feelings in ways that ignore the interests of others, they are acting aggressively in an indirect way. Aggressive behavior aims at hurting or dominating another person. In other words, the aggressive person always aims to win over the other person. As for submissive behaviour it implies ignoring one’s own interests in such a way it allows others to force their wants and desires on a person. Submissive behavior inhibits people from expressing themselves honestly and directly. It can cause people to build up anger and to feel negative about themselves.

Developing assertiveness skills in the EFL classroom

Teaching Assertiveness in the ESL classroom might present a 1) set of exercises integrated into a lessons or 2) a series of lessons devoted to teaching assertiveness and influencing skills. In teaching assertiveness skills at Plekhanov Russian University students were engaged in practicing assertiveness skills activities during 9 classes, 30 minutes out of 1,5 hour class were dedicated to these activities. The classroom activities helped analyse students’ assertiveness skills, identify the areas that needed improvement and apply assertiveness techniques to students own encounters.

The objectives of teaching assertiveness were:

1. To teach students to understand what assertive, passive, and aggressive behaviors present
2. To practice assertive communication and assertive communication techniques
3. To practice relevant language to use assertiveness techniques.

The classes were aimed at combining teaching assertive communication techniques with learning and practicing specific language, relevant to students’ proficiency level. (see appendix 1).

At the beginning of teaching assertiveness skills the students were explained the difference between assertive, aggressive and submissive or passive behaviour. A general definition of the term was presented by the teacher first. Then in order to brainstorm, understand and reinforce the meaning of assertive behaviour the students were given an assignment to guess and split the given traits into 3 groups according to (A) Assertive, (B) Aggressive and (C) Submissive/Passive communication. The students guessed what type of communication each statement could be referred to, for example: a person who admits mistakes (A), Speaks in a loud or overbearing manner (B), Allows others to infringe upon his/her rights (C).

Further on, based on understanding the 3 types of behaviour the students guessed the statements with the appropriate behavior style (A) Assertive, (B) Aggressive, (C) Submissive:

“No, thank you. But, I do appreciate your inviting me.”(A)
“It’s your fault that we are not getting the funds we needed (B)
“Well, I’m not sure. It’s hard to decide.”(C)

Explanation and insight into the meaning and importance of “assertiveness” was followed by students’ self-assessment test. The test was adjusted to the students’ proficiency level, in my classes I used the test for Intermediate level students, assessment test was answered by 60 students, with the maximum score 60 referring to assertive behaviour. 80 % of students had total score from 45 to 60, 15 % - more than 60 and 5 % had total score from 45 to 60. To sum up, according to the test findings most of the students had a fairly assertive outlook, there were some situations in which they might be assertive, but they should have been able to increase their assertiveness through practice.

The next activity was called “The use of I statement framework” and the technique concerned using I statements which can be used to handle situations assertively. I statements can be used to sort out conflicts without inflaming situations. I statements involve speaking from the first person, saying “ I” instead “You”. Speaking from the “I” position can make a difference to help someone else to hear the message. I statements help people:

1. Take responsibility for their thoughts,
2. Avoid blaming anyone for a situation or conflict,
3. Tell the other person what they honestly think, feel, want or need.

“I” messages don’t blame or shame other people; they express peoples thoughts and emotions in honest and appropriate way. A useful way to demonstrate “I” statements for my students was to introduce the statements in opposition to “You” statements and ask students which of the statements sounded more assertive in their opinion:

You should have told me or I didn’t know
You never listen – I’d like you to listen to me.
You are lazy – I’d like some help with working on the project

Further on the students were taught the four steps of creating ‘I” statements. “I” statements

1. Begins with the word I
2. Expresses what you feel, think or feel or need.
   • I feel anger
   • I think this because
   • I need this to be done because…
3. Describes the other person’s behavior that created the situation (and a speaker should refer to the behaviour not to the person)
4. Expresses the outcome or communicators’ desire and why they need it.

For example, I get irritated when you interrupt me when I am talking. I’d like to finish what I have to say before you speak because I lose my train of thoughts.
“I” statements were introduced in context and the students were asked to split the statement into 4 parts:
“I get angry /when you tell me you will support me, and then don’t support me in a meeting./ In the future, I want to be able to count on your support./ We can get the proposal approved if we show cooperation.”

Changing “I” statements into “You” statements, activities and practicing “Three line message” students filled the gaps, composed and presented a role play.

For the next technique, I used the abbreviation S.P.I.N., it was easier for students to memorise what this technique stands for: Situation, Problem, Implication, and Need.

This technique is also called Scripting which involves planning out what a speaker wants to say in a structured way. This is a four-stage approach that covers: Situation, Problem, Implication, and Need.

The elements needs and implications/ or consequences might change their place. A role play was used to practice that technique.

For example, “You are a sales manager of consumer electronic goods. Your account/customer ordered a particular range of products but the order was delivered 2 weeks later. The customer wants to cancel the order. You are discussing this issue with the sales director.”
This is an example of one of the student: “The payment terms haven’t been finalized so far.
Therefore the customers can’t plan the quarter orders properly.
The orders in the order book might be below the targets.
We should discuss and finalise financial terms for each customer this week.”

One of the applied techniques concerned “Empathic Assertion”. Empathy means trying to understand another person’s feelings, needs or wants. This type of assertion can be used when the other person is involved in a situation that may not fit with the other person’s needs, and the person wants to indicate that he/she is aware of and sensitive to their position.

For example :

• "I recognise that it's difficult to be precise on costs, however, I need a rough estimate."
• "I imagine you are really exhausted after all the work you did this morning, but I need this document by 3 PM today."

Another technique which I used is called “Broken Record”. This technique allows to feel comfortable by ignoring manipulative verbal side traps, argumentative baiting and irrelevant logic while sticking to the speaker’s point. The following phrases were introduced to the students:

• That may be but…
• I understand, however…
• I see your point and…

I would like to emphasise that it was vital to implement integrated approach – in terms of the four main communication skills – speaking, reading, listening and writing. Students’ involvement in task- based meaningful interaction was crucial, and the content itself and assertive communication technique learning and practicing also boosted students’ motivation and interest. The cases (Zubkova E.V., Rostovtseva E.V. 2013, pp. 11-12) and assignments were used for practicing the assertiveness techniques in a tasked based meaningful context. The students read the case. Then they presented a role play, one of them was a customer, the other – a supervisor of a shop and they managed to fulfill the relevant intentions and practice most of the learnt assertiveness techniques in presenting solutions in the role play. After the course the students’ feedback was that learning assertiveness techniques and skills was useful in their study and daily life. They became more confident in managing relationships and communication with other people in both the native and English languages.

Appendix 1. Assertiveness skills and language links. Intermediate level

References

Back, R & Back, K. (1986). Assertiveness at Work – A Practical guide to Handling Awkward Situations.McGraw Hill, London.

Dudina M.N. (2014). Assertive behavior in the ethical and pedagogical discourse. Proceedings of the Ural Federal University. Serija 1: Problemy obrazovanija, nauki i kul’tury. № 4 (132). P. 163–172. [in Russian].

Dept. of Education and Science, Marlborough St. (1997). Assertive Communication. Dublin 1, Ireland, 2nd Edition

Michel, F. (2008). Assert Yourself. Perth, Western Australia: Centre for Clinical Interventions. ISBN: 0-9757995-5-X Created: November, 2008

Rogers K. (1994). A look at psychotherapy. Becoming a man – Ed. from English. M.M. Iseninoy. M.: Progress, Univers.. 480 p. [in Russian].

Smith M. (2001)Training confidence. SPb.: Rech. 203 p. [in Russian].

Zubkova E.V., Rostovtseva E.V. (2013). Case Studies and Assignments for Discussion in the ESL Classroom. Moscow. Plekhanov Russian University of Economics., pp. 11-12

http://www.tgassociates.com/freetipsheets/ho-assertquiz.asp

http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ps/assertiveness-techniques.html

https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/Assertiveness.htm

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Please check the here at Pilgrims website.
Please check the here at Pilgrims website.